HUMILITY is a big word; not because i just wrote it in all caps. Nor because of its eight letters. It's a big word because of all of its connotations and false definitions and misinterpretations that are poisonous to our thinking. Instead of bringing up all sorts of ideas of freedom and fulfilled life, the word tends to throw clouds over our minds, and weigh heavy on our brain areas that deal with compulsion. It doesn't make sense to our physical-world-immersed selves.
What a clever trick! Humility really is the most freeing and wonderfully joyful thing that one could possibly embody. It is really counter-intuitive, but when you let go of that, and close your eyes and fall backwards into it, you find that it is the strongest support you'll ever find because it is the Father's Rest. Too bad i don't live there. What does it take? How do we get out from underneath the layers of stacks of worry and care, and just be? What if we're too weak to cast them off?
I think the answer is really close to "Just forget." It's sort of like C.S. Lewis's discussion of Contemplation vs. Enjoyment--they're mutually exclusive, but also codependent.
All this philosophizing...
Note: the 'discussion' link isn't to an exhaustive explanation of the idea, but rather an article mentioning Lewis's thoughts and making an entirely different point at the end. I could have done more research to provide you with a better link, and i may do so in the future. Sorry.
31 March 2008
28 March 2008
Whose child are you?
Note: this is from a weekly email by Garold Andersen of Watershed Arts. It's this wonderful every time. -mg
John 8:39 "Our father is Abraham!" they replied. Jesus said, "No. If you were Abraham's children you would act like him."
Looking through the titles on the non-fiction best-seller list a week ago, I saw book after book with 'God' in the title: The God Delusion, God is not Great, Against all Gods, etc. As the titles imply, the authors of these books are writing that believing in God is not only nonsense; it's dangerous.
Why do you imagine that millions of people would buy these books aimed at eradicating the concept of God from the world? Do they actually view God as the enemy of their happiness? Obviously many do. The books I've mentioned, however, are not to blame.
Was it the pagan system of Rome that Jesus confronted in the above verse or was it those who said they knew God? If Mr. Smith's children are bullies, cheats, and liars, why would Mr. Smith be any different? If his children said, "Our father is full of love and teaches us to love others", you would shake your head in disbelief. But when Mr. Smith's children claim to be the children of God, many of the people who meet them say, "I hope the God of these arrogant bullies doesn't really exist." And they are happy when someone writes a book that says he doesn't.
There is not much I can do about those who say that believing in God is stupid or dangerous. There's also little I can do about those who misrepresent God through their greed, lies, and arrogance. I can, however, pray that I am not one of them. "Son of God, full of love and grace, here are the pages of my life. Write the powerful evidence of Your character in me."
John 8:39 "Our father is Abraham!" they replied. Jesus said, "No. If you were Abraham's children you would act like him."
Looking through the titles on the non-fiction best-seller list a week ago, I saw book after book with 'God' in the title: The God Delusion, God is not Great, Against all Gods, etc. As the titles imply, the authors of these books are writing that believing in God is not only nonsense; it's dangerous.
Why do you imagine that millions of people would buy these books aimed at eradicating the concept of God from the world? Do they actually view God as the enemy of their happiness? Obviously many do. The books I've mentioned, however, are not to blame.
Was it the pagan system of Rome that Jesus confronted in the above verse or was it those who said they knew God? If Mr. Smith's children are bullies, cheats, and liars, why would Mr. Smith be any different? If his children said, "Our father is full of love and teaches us to love others", you would shake your head in disbelief. But when Mr. Smith's children claim to be the children of God, many of the people who meet them say, "I hope the God of these arrogant bullies doesn't really exist." And they are happy when someone writes a book that says he doesn't.
There is not much I can do about those who say that believing in God is stupid or dangerous. There's also little I can do about those who misrepresent God through their greed, lies, and arrogance. I can, however, pray that I am not one of them. "Son of God, full of love and grace, here are the pages of my life. Write the powerful evidence of Your character in me."
23 March 2008
cookery
I've been mussing about in the kitchen quite a bit lately, and thought i should share some of my successful recipes with you.
Yummy Cookie Things That I Sort Of Made Up
Preheat the oven! 350.
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 cup white flour
almost 1 cup wheat germ (about 1/2 inch from the top of the measuring cup)
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
Blend these until it looks like a pile of healthy nutrition. Then make a depression in the middle and add:
large glop of peanut butter (maybe around 1/2 cup?)
1 stick softened butter
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup white sugar
1 egg
several squirts of vanilla extract
Start mashing these around until it starts looking uniform. If it is too dry, add:
another egg
and maybe 2 tblsp vegetable oil (if it's still too dry). It shouldn't stick to the bowl much, and be nicely massive.
Add about 1/2 cup of coconut, and mix again.
Roll with your hands into little balls (about 1 inch in diameter) and bake for about 12 minutes, until the top looks dry. These are so small and yummy that they're hard to stop eating, so beware! Also, i baked some extra dough in the bottom of a pie pan and it made an excellent cheesecake crust.
Really Delicious Bok Choy Salad
Dressing:
1/2 cup vinegar (my recipe said red wine vinegar, but i used apple cider because that's what we had)
1/2 cup olive oil
1/2 cup white sugar (this seemed like a lot to me. Maybe less would be better.)
2 tblsp soy sauce
Mix and set aside.
Salad:
1 head bok choy
Wash and shred. The white stems are good, too, but i used mostly the leaves.
The recipe called for green onions, but i didn't add any.
Crunchies:
1.5 cup chow mein noodles (the recipe called for 2 packages of dry ramen, which i think would be better)
1/2 cup slivered almonds
Stir-fry in a little oil for a few minutes, until crunchy and flavorful. Careful to keep stirring or it burns!
Add the crunchies to the salad, and toss with the dressing. Serve immediately.
Yummy Cookie Things That I Sort Of Made Up
Preheat the oven! 350.
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 cup white flour
almost 1 cup wheat germ (about 1/2 inch from the top of the measuring cup)
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
Blend these until it looks like a pile of healthy nutrition. Then make a depression in the middle and add:
large glop of peanut butter (maybe around 1/2 cup?)
1 stick softened butter
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup white sugar
1 egg
several squirts of vanilla extract
Start mashing these around until it starts looking uniform. If it is too dry, add:
another egg
and maybe 2 tblsp vegetable oil (if it's still too dry). It shouldn't stick to the bowl much, and be nicely massive.
Add about 1/2 cup of coconut, and mix again.
Roll with your hands into little balls (about 1 inch in diameter) and bake for about 12 minutes, until the top looks dry. These are so small and yummy that they're hard to stop eating, so beware! Also, i baked some extra dough in the bottom of a pie pan and it made an excellent cheesecake crust.
Really Delicious Bok Choy Salad
Dressing:
1/2 cup vinegar (my recipe said red wine vinegar, but i used apple cider because that's what we had)
1/2 cup olive oil
1/2 cup white sugar (this seemed like a lot to me. Maybe less would be better.)
2 tblsp soy sauce
Mix and set aside.
Salad:
1 head bok choy
Wash and shred. The white stems are good, too, but i used mostly the leaves.
The recipe called for green onions, but i didn't add any.
Crunchies:
1.5 cup chow mein noodles (the recipe called for 2 packages of dry ramen, which i think would be better)
1/2 cup slivered almonds
Stir-fry in a little oil for a few minutes, until crunchy and flavorful. Careful to keep stirring or it burns!
Add the crunchies to the salad, and toss with the dressing. Serve immediately.
19 March 2008
fear and trembling
work it out.
punkins, make them muffiny and sugary and then bite them. mm.
in the same way, thrill to opportunites placed before you to serve and surrender.
the meek shall inherit the earth.
check the engine.
punkins, make them muffiny and sugary and then bite them. mm.
in the same way, thrill to opportunites placed before you to serve and surrender.
the meek shall inherit the earth.
check the engine.
12 March 2008
here comes the sun
It's been a crazy week so far; it feels like it's been eons long. I've spent lots of time at dear Lewis & Clark. My emotions have gone wild. And i've leared several valuable lessons.
1) Pay close attention to following distance, especially when it's rush hour and there is a long line of vehicles on the on-ramp. If you don't, one likely outcome is an hour spent trying to un-spear your front bumper from the truck's trailer hitch in front of you, and a driver's door that is inoperable. I know all this from experience. Tip: offering carrot sticks, no matter how delicious, can be ineffective as apology for delaying 4 youths from their dinner.
2) The word "haver" means to talk foolishly or babble, used mostly in Scottish English. Just thought you should know. It's in that song... you know.. the one about walking a thousand miles to fall down at your door (probably one of my top ten favorite songs in the universe. i just love it a whole lot). And i was so curious.
3) It's much easier to wake up early when we have Sprung Forward (perhaps i shall rant about that at another time.. i strongly disagree with Daylight Savings adjustments) when you have an incentive, such as a meeting for Bible study that you know is going to refresh your soul and challenge your heart and realign your priorities. However, it is disappointing to miss the sunrise because of said time change.
4) Casting your cares upon the LORD is an effective way to practice humility. Drinking chocolate malts is not. This is sort of a strange one, and kind of the reason i started this blog entry. Ever since i got back from my meanderings, i've been eating really properly and healthily, almost like i don't care about food anymore. Before i would count food groups and relish sweets and always lick the bowl when i made a cake, and loved food. Lately it's been more that i eat when i'm hungry, stop when i'm full, have what is yummy and healthy, and not really have an appetite for sweets. It's wonderful because i'm always satisfied and full of energy, and food isn't that important to me--i don't think about it much. But today, for some reason, it seemed that i went back to old habits. I had half of Colin's cinnamon roll at work when i had already had a delicious and fulfilling breakfast, and after i ate a perfectly satisfactory lunch, i went to Sonic and got a chocolate malt. Why? I guess i'm used to indulging. But it was against my preference. I didn't really want either the roll or the malt--i had them out of habit. So if humility is "just being honest," then it was prideful to eat those things. I didn't want them. I was satisfied without them. Plus, they were an avenue for worry, because i know what sweet and fatty things do to bodies. That care was something that i didn't cast upon the LORD. I had created it myself.
I love learning lessons. I love growing and making mistakes and learning how not to make them in the future. I love not being perfect. It makes life interesting.
...it's all right.
1) Pay close attention to following distance, especially when it's rush hour and there is a long line of vehicles on the on-ramp. If you don't, one likely outcome is an hour spent trying to un-spear your front bumper from the truck's trailer hitch in front of you, and a driver's door that is inoperable. I know all this from experience. Tip: offering carrot sticks, no matter how delicious, can be ineffective as apology for delaying 4 youths from their dinner.
2) The word "haver" means to talk foolishly or babble, used mostly in Scottish English. Just thought you should know. It's in that song... you know.. the one about walking a thousand miles to fall down at your door (probably one of my top ten favorite songs in the universe. i just love it a whole lot). And i was so curious.
3) It's much easier to wake up early when we have Sprung Forward (perhaps i shall rant about that at another time.. i strongly disagree with Daylight Savings adjustments) when you have an incentive, such as a meeting for Bible study that you know is going to refresh your soul and challenge your heart and realign your priorities. However, it is disappointing to miss the sunrise because of said time change.
4) Casting your cares upon the LORD is an effective way to practice humility. Drinking chocolate malts is not. This is sort of a strange one, and kind of the reason i started this blog entry. Ever since i got back from my meanderings, i've been eating really properly and healthily, almost like i don't care about food anymore. Before i would count food groups and relish sweets and always lick the bowl when i made a cake, and loved food. Lately it's been more that i eat when i'm hungry, stop when i'm full, have what is yummy and healthy, and not really have an appetite for sweets. It's wonderful because i'm always satisfied and full of energy, and food isn't that important to me--i don't think about it much. But today, for some reason, it seemed that i went back to old habits. I had half of Colin's cinnamon roll at work when i had already had a delicious and fulfilling breakfast, and after i ate a perfectly satisfactory lunch, i went to Sonic and got a chocolate malt. Why? I guess i'm used to indulging. But it was against my preference. I didn't really want either the roll or the malt--i had them out of habit. So if humility is "just being honest," then it was prideful to eat those things. I didn't want them. I was satisfied without them. Plus, they were an avenue for worry, because i know what sweet and fatty things do to bodies. That care was something that i didn't cast upon the LORD. I had created it myself.
I love learning lessons. I love growing and making mistakes and learning how not to make them in the future. I love not being perfect. It makes life interesting.
...it's all right.
06 March 2008
heart-melters
My heart feels. It's just feely right now; i don't know how to describe it. It's kind of heavy, and a funny-hurt (like a bruise, you know? or ants in your feet) is sitting there. It kind of swirls up with these things:
1. "Mom and Dad" by Jason Upton. It's a song about growing up. Here are the lyrics:
Mom and dad take a look at me
On my bike riding both hands free
And I'm all right
It's a good night
I'm bigger now that I've ever been
Training wheels, got no need for them
Mom, I'm growing
Dad, I got to get going
We are not the same
Every day, we are changing
Another season fades
But that's o.k.
We are changing anyway
Mom and dad look who's holding me
Someone I get to love and
Dream with on cold nights
And through the hard times
We're sailing out to the great unknown
Our hearts are set on that perfect home
Mom, we won't fight
Dad, the wind's right
Mom and dad the kids sure grow up fast
The more they grow up the more I ask
What am I doing?
I hope it doesn't ruin them
Your ways are worth more than costly gems
I'm digging up my past to remember them
Mom, I love you
Dad, there's nobody like you
Oh man. There's so much about family, and love, and perpetual child-likeness here.. what beauty there is in child-likeness! That swirls my heart so much!
2. The other day i read this about my incredible Savior (Mattew 8:1-2):
When he came down from the mountain, great crowds followed him. And behold, a leper came to him and knelt before him, saying, "Lord, if you will, you can make me clean." And Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, saying, "I will; be clean." And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.
Do you see it? Do you see the rush of "of COURSE," the compassion, the love? How tender and beautiful! I had to read it over and over, and remember not to cry.
3. Today in the store i was checking out (in the clerk sense of the word) a man.. and his name was so Korean that i had to ask him. It turned out that he was the pastor of the Korean church in our community! I wanted to talk with him more, and ask him lots of questions, but i also wanted to respect cultural boundaries, and situational boundaries, i suppose. The store was pretty busy. But that encounter made my day. There were also these beautiful women, one from India and one from Columbia, who were preparing for a ski trip with their families, and it was such a joy to help them.
4. I'm meeting with a mom for Bible study whose heart is so beautiful..
I don't know why i'm crying right now. It's all these things, i suppose, and the snow outside, and being warm inside, and having my parents here, and knowing that i'm loved (Mom just came in and brought me tissues and held me, because she heard me crying). Yes. I think that's it. Love. I think my heart is growing.
1. "Mom and Dad" by Jason Upton. It's a song about growing up. Here are the lyrics:
Mom and dad take a look at me
On my bike riding both hands free
And I'm all right
It's a good night
I'm bigger now that I've ever been
Training wheels, got no need for them
Mom, I'm growing
Dad, I got to get going
We are not the same
Every day, we are changing
Another season fades
But that's o.k.
We are changing anyway
Mom and dad look who's holding me
Someone I get to love and
Dream with on cold nights
And through the hard times
We're sailing out to the great unknown
Our hearts are set on that perfect home
Mom, we won't fight
Dad, the wind's right
Mom and dad the kids sure grow up fast
The more they grow up the more I ask
What am I doing?
I hope it doesn't ruin them
Your ways are worth more than costly gems
I'm digging up my past to remember them
Mom, I love you
Dad, there's nobody like you
Oh man. There's so much about family, and love, and perpetual child-likeness here.. what beauty there is in child-likeness! That swirls my heart so much!
2. The other day i read this about my incredible Savior (Mattew 8:1-2):
When he came down from the mountain, great crowds followed him. And behold, a leper came to him and knelt before him, saying, "Lord, if you will, you can make me clean." And Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, saying, "I will; be clean." And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.
Do you see it? Do you see the rush of "of COURSE," the compassion, the love? How tender and beautiful! I had to read it over and over, and remember not to cry.
3. Today in the store i was checking out (in the clerk sense of the word) a man.. and his name was so Korean that i had to ask him. It turned out that he was the pastor of the Korean church in our community! I wanted to talk with him more, and ask him lots of questions, but i also wanted to respect cultural boundaries, and situational boundaries, i suppose. The store was pretty busy. But that encounter made my day. There were also these beautiful women, one from India and one from Columbia, who were preparing for a ski trip with their families, and it was such a joy to help them.
4. I'm meeting with a mom for Bible study whose heart is so beautiful..
I don't know why i'm crying right now. It's all these things, i suppose, and the snow outside, and being warm inside, and having my parents here, and knowing that i'm loved (Mom just came in and brought me tissues and held me, because she heard me crying). Yes. I think that's it. Love. I think my heart is growing.
04 March 2008
the friendship continuum
"We can be friends if you want to
There's a friendship waiting to be..."
--Jason Upton, "Beautiful People"
We, as humans, were created for community. The evidence is everywhere, including Scripture. God, as a triune being, is community (i suppose i'm equating it to love); and this sweet fellowship, this sharing in life together, is probably the greatest gift He has given to mankind. Friendship can be difficult, too. One has to work, to invest, to pursue and put effort into friendships, or they peter out. Quality of life is determined by the quality of connection with others.
Every once in a while, however, it is extremely obvious that something is different. Have you ever met someone for the first time, asked them about their heart, or their thoughts, and every word they say could have come out of your own mouth? You may not have much else in common, but processes of mind and heart. It's almost impossible to express in words the deep connection and utter excitement that you feel. Your mind races to find ways to make them understand, "ME TOO! Same same!" Sometimes it feels awkward, because you don't want them to think you're just trying to be cool and relate to them by saying "Me too" to everything they say (point brought up by Evan King).When i met Jessie Elledge in the summer of 2004, it was the first time i had experienced this incredibly immediate bond, and it set my philosophizing wheels a-turning. I labeled it the Dear Friend Phenomenon.
Well, there must be an opposite sort of friend, i thought, and so there is. It's the sort of friend that you share experiences with, and that you grow closer with over time. It is true that the Lord knits your hearts together, but it takes time; perhaps you have more in common. This sort of friend i call a Close Friend. I also realized that there were varying degrees; that it was more of a continuum, Dear at one end and Close at the other. There are definitely those in between; you feel quickly connected with them, but as time goes on you discover this more and more (example for me: Lindi Phillips).
As i shared my hypothesis with Jessie, and as we have become closer (if possible), we have been able to add more evidence to the case. When she went away to Bible school for a year, she remarked to me that her dearest friends were her closest friends there. The people she felt immediatly connected with were the people she spent time with. I experienced this, too, when i did my DTS. We decided that this was a result of such close, intense community, and perhaps did not apply to our continuum.
Friends are wonderful, on or off such a scientific scale. I'd love to be a better one. In any event, community is life. I'm thankful for that.
There's a friendship waiting to be..."
--Jason Upton, "Beautiful People"
We, as humans, were created for community. The evidence is everywhere, including Scripture. God, as a triune being, is community (i suppose i'm equating it to love); and this sweet fellowship, this sharing in life together, is probably the greatest gift He has given to mankind. Friendship can be difficult, too. One has to work, to invest, to pursue and put effort into friendships, or they peter out. Quality of life is determined by the quality of connection with others.
Every once in a while, however, it is extremely obvious that something is different. Have you ever met someone for the first time, asked them about their heart, or their thoughts, and every word they say could have come out of your own mouth? You may not have much else in common, but processes of mind and heart. It's almost impossible to express in words the deep connection and utter excitement that you feel. Your mind races to find ways to make them understand, "ME TOO! Same same!" Sometimes it feels awkward, because you don't want them to think you're just trying to be cool and relate to them by saying "Me too" to everything they say (point brought up by Evan King).When i met Jessie Elledge in the summer of 2004, it was the first time i had experienced this incredibly immediate bond, and it set my philosophizing wheels a-turning. I labeled it the Dear Friend Phenomenon.
Well, there must be an opposite sort of friend, i thought, and so there is. It's the sort of friend that you share experiences with, and that you grow closer with over time. It is true that the Lord knits your hearts together, but it takes time; perhaps you have more in common. This sort of friend i call a Close Friend. I also realized that there were varying degrees; that it was more of a continuum, Dear at one end and Close at the other. There are definitely those in between; you feel quickly connected with them, but as time goes on you discover this more and more (example for me: Lindi Phillips).
As i shared my hypothesis with Jessie, and as we have become closer (if possible), we have been able to add more evidence to the case. When she went away to Bible school for a year, she remarked to me that her dearest friends were her closest friends there. The people she felt immediatly connected with were the people she spent time with. I experienced this, too, when i did my DTS. We decided that this was a result of such close, intense community, and perhaps did not apply to our continuum.
Friends are wonderful, on or off such a scientific scale. I'd love to be a better one. In any event, community is life. I'm thankful for that.
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